I Hope

Yesterday . . . Wait, no, not yesterday because all day yesterday was spent on Katie's orange couch, cuddled under blankets with tea and too many sweets watching "Downton Abbey," and then going line dancing. Yes, line dancing! So, it must have been the day before –– on Thursday.

So on Thursday, I had my induction into the University of Leeds English program, which was of course marked by tea and biscuits, along with an orientation speech and first meetings with our supervising tutors (professors). My specialization, modern & contemporary literature, is a small one –– only 2 new students accepted this term. This is both amazing and scary: scary because I will not have a class of others to hide behind, but amazing because we'll really dig deep into the novels and essays on our reading lists, tossing around ideas with a professor who has studied contemporary literature and culture his entire adult life. I cannot wait for classes to start on Monday. When I say "I'm studying literature," everyone assumes I mean the Bronte Sisters, Beowulf, Twain and Austen. While I adore the classics, it's really rather fun to study the books that are newer and in some ways stranger, but still define art (in my opinion). Talking to my professor and fellow classmate got me high on academics again (nerd alert, I know). After leaving Professor Carroll's office, which is wall-to-wall books (Morrison, Melville and McCarthy... love it!), I started thinking about the time I will no longer be in school (though some people may argue this day will never come). And I realized how deeply I desire to always be learning. Here are my hopes for my future, whatever comes next.

I hope I never tire of thinking new thoughts. I hope I never grow complacent with what I already know. I hope I never lose that nervous feeling I get when I'm out of my element, which can be harnessed into so much creative energy.  I hope I never stop loving deep conversations. I hope I never leave off wondering about human nature and about what drive us –– our families, our art, our cultures, our personalities, our lifestyles. I hope I'm never stuck in narrow-minded views. I hope I won't stop scribbling notes in books' margins and underlining parts that make me stop and think (this is why as awesome as the Kindle is, I can never love it like a real book). I hope I'll always want to ponder the complexities of purpose, beauty, faith, and relationships. I hope I never stop reading in inappropriate places at inappropriate times. I hope I'm always inspired by the people I meet, the places I see, the things I read, the conversations I have, the subjects I study, the thoughts I think, the experiences I live. I hope I never quit seeking the advice and opinions of those smarter than me. I hope I strive to define my own thoughts in a way that's constructive. I hope knowledge is always rich and never dry. I hope I'll always find God through the beauty and pain of human nature that I find both in life and in reading.